"Hello, how are you today?"

One of the most common phrases heard on the phone today. If you ask me this on the phone, then you probably don't know me well enough to be calling me in the first place. If you cared, you would (more-than-likely) know what my response will be. If you are a:

• Tech support representative from India
• Organization asking for a donation
• Wrong phone number caller
• Someone with good news
• Someone with bad news
• Anyone that calls me.....

Please stop calling! The main purpose in owning a phone is for instant communication when it is needed. If I need a pizza, I call. If I need and ambulance, I call. If my DirecTV is on the fritz, I call. 

If I need to tell my mother something other than her house is on fire, I ... GO VISIT!!!  Phones have become one of the biggest crutches for loneliness. If you need to talk to someone that much, get a roommate, get married, or call a 976 number. (At least someone will benefit from it)

Is it necessary to call me from my driveway to tell me that you're here? Or do you really need to carry on a conversation at 70 miles-per-hour? Is it really that important to have a phone that you will stick a 'bud' in your ear and walk around like a homeless person talking to yourself?   

If you consider calling me for no reason, then remember the following -